Waiting for ORAS to be released in Europe... gotta wait until this Friday. Yes. The 28th
I'm in the midst of moving out. Just started the moving-out-of-parent's-places-into-our-first-home process with the wonderful obahuds
. Gonna take some time before all the paperwork and checks and whatnot are done. I need to get out of this house.
A head's up to anyone reading beyond this point: I'm venting.
Like I said, I need to move out of this house. It's not good for me and my mentality, soaking up other's moods like a sponge. People feel sad and too consumed in their own worries in this house. I can understand that we're all trying to get on but it makes it very difficult finding someone to vent to when I need to because I don't want to burden them further with my own issues. I feel very much aware right now that I'm nearing the edge of what I feel I can tolerate and I need to take some time to dig deep and chill. Getting up in the mornings to go work has been hard this week (when I'm there it's not so bad; mornings aren't great but the afternoons are better). I don't know if it's the weather (back-to-back days of grey depressing cloud bothers me, I need some sunlight!), the time of year, the number of daylight hours, the fact it's colder, the mood of the house and those I live with, the stress of finally talking to people about the process of moving house, work changes and alterations in regards to the three roles I do whilst I'm there, or something I haven't thought of yet. I left work on Friday because I thought I was gonna be sick, stomach decided to go from nauseous to hungry back to nauseous all day, tiredness kicking in... I wanna cry. Just waiting for the thing that will make me.
I truly love how wonderful my boyfriend is in listening to me spew my crap. I don't know where I'd be without him. I just wish we lived together now so I'd have someone to spew my crap to through weekdays and not just over weekends... though I don't want to overburden him with my misery. I know I shouldn't think I'm being a pain to anyone but that's what my mind says and kinda how I've been brought up to feel. Not intentionally of course but it's had an impact on my willingness to pester others and apologise for taking up their time...
Art... I have little motivation to draw. Or write. Momentary loss of interest. I get home from work, I somehow whittle the time away and then wonder where my evening's gone. Then I do it all over again the next day. I made myself write the other day but not much happened. I don't know what to draw.
I sound miserable in my own head. I'm writing this to vent. I'm not expecting anyone to respond in all honesty.
Hope everyone is well.